🛤️ The Skill That Matters More Than Picking the Right Path
I had breakfast with a friend over the weekend who's deep in a classic “should I stay or should I go” dilemma. In this case, about her job.
Both options felt terrifying.
Stay, and keep feeling stuck, stagnant, and worn down by the daily despondence of knowing there’s nothing for you here.
Leave, and face the anxiety of uprooting her life as she’s known it for the past seven years, and the nausea of starting again with no guarantees.
“I’ve been so anxious all week trying to figure out which one is the right choice,” she told me between bites of poached eggs and avocado.
So much of what shapes our careers - and our lives - comes down to the choices we make.
Which is why as a coach, I’m naturally obsessed with the ones we make and how we make them. And something I’ve noticed lately, both in my clients and myself, is how often perfectionist thinking hijacks our decision-making process.
Not just about what choice to make.
But believing there is one single right choice at all, and that anything else would be a failure.
This belief was making the process of deciding almost unbearable for my friend, trapped between overthinking, analysis paralysis and anxiety.
It’s also why so many of us can fall into the trap of staying years (even decades) longer than we should, paralysed by the fear of making the “wrong” next move.
Perfectionist thinking treats your career like a game of Jenga.
The further you go, the more afraid you are that one wrong move will topple everything.
Take the job?
Leave the job?
Move countries?
Shut down the business?
Go freelance?
Each option feels like a potential collapse.
When the truth is less dramatic. It’s not inevitable that everything falls apart.
What is inevitable is that you can’t control all the outcomes.
And perfectionist thinking is just our brain’s way of trying to control the fear of uncertainty.
Possibility thinking is different.
It's not about picking the one perfect move.
It's about seeing every move as a chance to create new options, build resilience, and trust yourself to adapt along the way.
Shift to Try
If you’re finding yourself asking:
"What’s the right choice?"
Here are some questions to try instead that can shift you into a more expansive, possibility lens.
Which path opens up more options for me?
Which path allows me to play to my strengths more?
Which path aligns more closely to my values?
Which path am I only choosing out of safety?
Which path requires me to be courageous?
The goal isn’t to find the right path.
The goal is to move with alignment based on who you are today, and trust yourself to navigate what comes next and evolve along the way.
Just as I’m sure you’ve already done at least once before, right? 😉
P.S. If you're navigating your own "should I stay or should I go" season, you don't have to figure it out alone. I have a few free discovery calls slots open for May to help you map your next move with more clarity and confidence. I'd love to support you.
P.P.S If you’re sitting with a big decision right now, the Conflicted episode of my podcast might help. It includes a guided exercise designed to help you get out of your head and reconnect to your deeper wisdom.