Flirting with life
“How will I know which one is right for me?
A client asked me this recently after we’d come up with three possible paths that she could explore that were aligned with the strengths, values and dreams that we’d spent the past few weeks clarifying for her.
The difference between the first option and the third option was pretty vast and would lead her life in totally different directions.
Understandably, she felt conflicted.
The deeper we go in our careers, the stakes often feel higher and higher with every move we make. Especially if you’ve managed to build some level of success or stability already, it can feel like playing Jenga.
You don’t want to pull out the block that makes everything come tumbling down.
If only there was some guarantee or reassurance that if we’re going to make a change, everything will work out and we’ll be happy and successful.
There’s no way of knowing though. We know that.
Which is why it feels so scary.
But instead of doing nothing, there is another way.
Testing.
If there’s anything I learned from the past five years working in tech, it’s test every damn thing.
“Try it out and see if you like it! If you don’t, you don’t have to keep doing it,” we’ll easily say to our kids, nieces and nephews, or younger cousins.
But for ourselves, we’re head down focusing on managing what we already have going on for fear of losing it. Which if you don’t have the safety net to catch you if things don’t work out, or even just the cushion to buffer a temporary setback or detour, then this is a very real tangible fear.
This isn’t an arranged marriage though. Just go on a date. And if that goes well, go on another one, and another one.
A test I’m flirting with at the moment is recording a podcast. As I’ve been thinking about more ways I can translate the kind of work that happens with clients beyond my sessions, the idea of a podcast came up.
I wasn’t sure if I’d enjoy doing it, if I’d be any good at it, would my ideas even translate into that kind of format? Would anyone even listen?
There’s no way of knowing, so I’m testing it out.
As we’ve been putting together the episodes I’ve had to reflect on my own different career transitions as well as my experiences with clients which reminded me of something.
Becoming a coach, started out as a test too.
An extended period of uncertainty at work had me restless and thinking about what was the bigger picture I was moving towards. From what I could see, there were a few different ways things could play out, and one of them was the seed of an idea of becoming a coach.
I wasn’t sure I’d enjoy coaching strangers. Would I even be good at it?
So I sent out an email out to a group of close friends and family, asking them to refer anyone they knew who would be open to free coaching for six weeks in exchange for feedback and testimonials.
My first few sessions were pretty nerve wracking and needed me to do some deep breathing before, but from the moment the other person popped up on the screen to the moment I pressed the “Leave Meeting” button, I was having so much fun.
Over the next year I did two certification courses and started taking on paying clients on the side of my day job. So by the time I left Facebook a year later, I had bucket loads of evidence that this was what I wanted to do and how I was going to do it.
Now it feels as if I’ve always been doing it. And actually this week, marks my two year ✨anniversary✨ since sending out those emails and starting my coaching journey.
So this is your reminder to just try.
Journal Prompts
What is something you’ve always wanted to try?
What is the very smallest way that you could test it out over the next week?
Who is one person already doing that thing that you could have a conversation with about what it’s like?